For your first date take her to see the sappiest romance movie in the cinema. Near the end secretly take out your phone and read the bit of the Full Metal Alchemist manga where Mustang cries at Hughes’s funeral. When she looks over and sees the tears streaming down your face she will be amazed at how compassionate and sensitive you are.
i always assume the worst of men and let them gradually prove themselves to me
Teacher: Reading a book is better than sex.
Teacher: It’s like a 10-hour orgasm!
Girl pipes up: Yeah, and with a book I actually get to finish!
[Boys’ laughter dies off almost instantly as the girls hoot]
fruit of the loom commercials get weirder every year
A Brazilian man recently submitted a birth certificate that if verified would mean he is 126-years-old.
According to the document, Jose Aguinelo dos Santos, was born on July 7, 1888 to African slave parents.
Once verified he will be the oldest man on the planet.